If 1 school has 400 students, 800 likes is 2 whole schools. Seeing "800 likes" on a dating app profile, the first thing that hits you is the sheer weight of the number. Not "popular in class" but "enough people to fill 2 school assemblies." Is this person an idol? Have they got a fan club? Or are they some ancient village elder of the app world who's been around forever?
But there's a first trap here. The official help page for with (a popular Japanese dating app) says that the likes you receive from others are deleted after a certain period. The reason given is that if likes piled up forever, long-time users might get shown first. So an 800 on the screen doesn't necessarily mean "800 total since the day they signed up." On top of that, the help page doesn't say how long that period actually is.
So 800 isn't a certificate of seniority. It's not a residence record, either.
Not all 800 people want a serious relationship, either
On with, a "like" is how you approach someone whose photos or profile caught your interest. If they send a "thank you" back, you match. The key point is that a like is only the first step.
All the number 800 tells you is that this person probably gets a lot of first reactions on the app. It does not mean "800 people carefully compared their options and decided this is the one they want to date."
On top of that, with gives members a regular allowance of likes depending on their membership type, and you can get extra ones with points. Since there are free and regular allowances, a single like is nowhere near as heavy a statement as a marriage registration. Some of those votes are just a bored "eh, why not" tap in a spare moment.
In other words, 800 isn't the final vote count in a love election. It's one enormous top of the funnel.
Still, "With that many options, why are they still looking?" is a natural question
This is the most interesting part. If someone's getting 800 reactions, it's tempting to get suspicious. "If they've got that many candidates and still haven't settled, maybe they're way too picky." "Maybe they're always hunting for someone better." "Maybe they're a veteran user who dated, broke up, and came back."
That worry isn't pure paranoia. Research on online dating has reported a "rejection mind-set": after looking at a long run of candidates, people become less willing to accept the next one. In 3 studies by Pronk and Denissen, the probability of accepting someone dropped by about 27% on average from the first candidate to the last. For women, the drop showed up consistently. For men, it was weaker or not statistically significant depending on the study.
Put simply, humans aren't machines that get happier forever as options increase. After dozens of rounds of "there's always a next one," the comparison mindset itself can get stronger.
But "800 = hell of endless pickiness" is a leap
Research pointing the other way matters here too. A 2024 study of 804 Greek speakers found that people who perceived more romantic options were directly more likely to be in a relationship and tended to have shorter stretches of being single. At the same time, having lots of options was also linked to choice overload (feeling so overwhelmed by choices that it's hard to pick), and that overload was linked to being single.
So having many options can work two ways at once: a plus path ("it's easier to find someone") and a minus path ("you can't decide").
That means it's sloppy to see 800 and instantly decide "this person is an eternal elder who can never choose." It's just as sloppy to decide "they're popular, so they must be great at love." The number is flashy, but it isn't a personality test.
What really matters is behavior after the match, not the like count
800 turns into a yellow light only when it comes with other patterns of behavior.
For example: after meeting person after person, they end things immediately every time over some tiny flaw. Conversation keeps circling around "maybe someone better is out there." They never firm up a plan to meet and just keep adding candidates. They mention how long they've been on the app, and over that whole time they've repeated the same sorting pattern.
If behaviors like these pile up, that's a reason to think a huge number of options may be shaping how they choose.
On the flip side: replies keep coming, they ask you questions back, plans to meet get concrete, you both put in effort to sort out a date, and the relationship moves forward even after you meet. That is much stronger information than the 800 next to the profile.
So, if someone with 800 likes likes you, is it worth anything?
Yes. Just not as much as "being decorated by the kingdom."
You showed up on the screen of someone with plenty of candidates, and in that first stage they said "yes" rather than "no." That's simply a plus. At the very least, your profile may be good enough to make the first cut in that crowd.
But if you yourself sometimes tap free likes in a quick "tap tap tap" way, then of course the other person may be doing the same. A like on its own is a weak signal.
The value goes up a notch once, after the match, they start doing things that cost something: writing real messages, asking questions, spending time, suggesting dates, actually meeting, and following up. In dating, time weighs more than a button.
Conclusion: 800 is fan-club level, but not an elder's certificate
As a number, 800 likes is genuinely fun. At 400 per school, that's 2 schools. The "are they an idol?" joke works.
But under with's official rules, the likes you receive are deleted after a certain period, so you can't read 800 as a lifetime total or as years of use. Research also suggests that a large pool of options can lead to rejecting people more readily and to choice overload, yet a larger pool of candidates also increases the chances of finding a partner.
So the most accurate way to read it is this:
"800. Wow. That's 2 schools' worth. Are you an idol or what? ...So what kind of person are they, actually?"
Whether someone's a veteran elder isn't something the number can tell you. Conversation and behavior can. 800 earns full marks as a conversation starter, and only bonus points as diagnostic evidence.
